a-polite-melody:

demoncarnie:

brokenblackcatskulls:

demoncarnie:

changeisnice:

demoncarnie:

You may be wondering why we have so many groups within the lgbt+ community that are trying to drive wedges between us and there is a simple explanation

Queer assimilationism

Queer assmilationism is the idea that in order to be acceptable by society standards we should water our selves down to be easier to swallow

It’s the idea that to be treated fairly by our oppressors we must become as close to them as possible

And in doing so those who fall into this ideology feel they must distance themselves from those in the community they see as beyond the point of being accepted.

Whether it be because our identities are too complicated or we challenge too many social norms or we demand too much respect and refuse to quiet, to queer assimilationists we are what they see as the road block between the community and social acceptance. Not the prejudice of society but rather those who can never settle into a cisheteronormative society without changing its social dynamics

Queer assimilationists put the blame of oppression on the oppressed rather than their oppressors because by picking on those below them on the societal scale they are able to mimic the behaviors of those they idealize, the privileged class.

Okay but like what’s wrong with following norms of social behavior? I am a white cis girl from an upper middle class family in suburban America. I have never once heard someone say they hate a minority group. What I have heard is people complain when people act entitled and out of line. When you yell at random people for no reason, flaunt yourself around, and constantly talk about the identity you have, it is annoying. That is not how people are expected to behave in society, and that disturbs people. We’re not asking you to “act straight” or hide who you are. We’re asking you to act like a normal person and talk to people like an adult.

I shouldn’t have to act like you to be treated with human decency, I’m a human already. And me being loud and proud doesn’t mean I don’t deserve to live or that I deserve to have my rights stripped away. There is no such thing as normal, this is my normal. This is the normal of me and my friends and our big happy community.

Your normal has no meaning to me and never will

Imagine the privilege it would take to think it’s okay for your cishet ass to respond to a post about queer assimilation like that. Do you realize that since /you/ get to decide what the norms are, lgbtq+ people get killed for not complying to them? Shut the fuck up.

Would you expect anything else from a white cis girl from an upper middle class family in suburban America?

Also super important to note with this stuff is that different assimilationists have different standards for what they think we should all conform to. To some, that’s as narrow as being monosexual, allosexual, cisgender (along with white, neurotypical, able bodied, not poor, etc., etc., etc., but mainly focusing here on specifically queer assimilationism).

Rather than coming at queer assimilationism and trying to determine where the “acceptable” place to draw the line is – is it okay to be bi? ply? pan? just be queer? ace? aro? using aspec microlabels? binary trans? nonbinary but binary aligned? nonbinary but be unaligned? nonbinary but refuse to use alignment labels? agender? genderqueer? genderfluid? using microlabels for your gender? using neopronouns? – and essentially always have people pushing or trying to push that line back and putting the standard back at monosexual, allosexual, cisgender and that’s it…

We need to not draw a line at all, not only because drawing that line always involves bigotry and exclusion from our communities, but also so that we don’t embolden those who want to keep the standard as watered down as possible (see: TERFs, truscum, etc.).