Category: Uncategorized

homesoutofhuman:

Me, calculating the age difference between me and a celebrity as if THAT is the biggest obstacle in our hypothetical relationship: yeah okay this could work

miseryghoul:

baaulp:

*holding both hands to the sides of my temple, struggling and sweating. A hotdog (no bun) levitates in front of my face*

Aaaaaaauuuuuuugggghhhh-

*The hotdog rockets forward past my face, splattering on the wall behind me*

*places another hotdog in front of you*

Again.

lesbianlinkle:

gay ponyta

llonelyrollingstarr:

mean-bean-machines:

concept: all normal checkouts are replaced with self-checkouts but instead of losing their jobs the cashiers now get to sit on top of lifeguard chairs and periodically throw wine glasses at me like dracula while i buy my goods

what is a customer? a miserable little pile of coupons