A real, actual, I-am-not-fucking-lying-to-you-this-truly-happened moment from the Christmas special Rapsittie Street Kids: Believe in Santa
ricky: great-grandma, you always know just what to say!
ricky’s great-grandma: dohuhohohwhehelghuhohokesynohehCHRISTMAS huahhahohoho
I thought of this while i was driving today and almost drove into my mailbox
It’s that time of year again
merry christmas
writingmyselfintoanearlygrave:
One day, you lose your wallet, and it is found by a mob boss, who figures out that you aren’t in such a good place financially, and takes pity on you. So they start anonymously sending cash, clothes, and furniture to you in the mail, eventually, the mob boss sends you a letter to stating that they bought you a house, and it lists an adress. What do you do?
In this economy? Thank them politely, pledge your loyalty, and join the mob.
Every morning we hop a little fence. Esper gets all jazzed about it, like we are doing something bad, so she shoots me this look like “OHHH MAN, we gonna get in soooo much trouble.”
the Gentle Alien is excited for Crimes
nothing makes me more nervous than my bus taking a different route then it normally does like???? where are u taking me
me: I’m the king of public transportation, a ghoul haunting the streets that run like veins through this city-
the bus: turns left where it normally goes straight
me: I am naked and alone in this universe and no one is watching over me
Big Gay Dracula Does a Shitpost 